


i'm famous on the internet

by hyoseumi



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Alternate Universe - College/University, Bisexual Female Character, Dirty Talk, Implied/Referenced Crossdressing, Implied/Referenced Drug Use, Jock/Nerd AU, M/M, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Stalking, Webcam/Video Chat Sex
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-07-08
Updated: 2020-09-16
Packaged: 2021-03-04 17:34:21
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 11,284
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25150207
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hyoseumi/pseuds/hyoseumi
Summary: Taeyong is a nerd otaku guy that lives with Sunhee, his grandma, who takes care of him since his parents died when he was a child. They live in a small town and although he is majoring in philosophy with a scholarship, he doesn't seem to get a job and he desperately needs one.
Relationships: Mark Lee/Lee Taeyong, Mark Lee/Nakamoto Yuta
Comments: 37
Kudos: 38





	1. ただ、まだ、私。

**Author's Note:**

> heeey ya! i've been thinking on writting this sort of au for a long time now! it's kind of cliche and different from what i usually write but i had planned more fanfic ideas in my mind that my english acknowledge won't let me write lol so here it is i guess? hope you like it, i wrote 6292 words for now so don't get too impatient if i don't upload it with frecuency :( i will do my best to deliver, since my other multi-chaptered fanfics are unfinished.

Taeyong is a normal guy, living in a normal town, with a not-so normal family. In a place like that, people will always talk. “How is it your grandson doing?” “Is he studying?” “Does he practice any sports?” “He looks a little quiet, are you sure he is okay?”  
He wishes he couldn’t listen the many excuses Sunhee —his grandma, is always making up to get rid of gossip neighbours. She breaths deeply and coughs a bit just to scare the shit out of that stupid woman, and it works.  
Taeyong laughs, indeed he is always laughing. He has a cheerful personality that doesn’t match his insides at all. It’s not like he is a dark person, but he is not definitely happy. How could he be happy? Since his parents died in that car accident, he’s been living with Sunhee, who can’t get a job due to her age and condition. Although he got a scholarship and started the university two years ago, economically talking they can’t assure much.  
Almost a year ago, he got a part-time job in a coffee shop but got fired because the business went down. Since that time, he couldn’t find another job because they live in a small town and everyone got their family in the business so there’s no place for someone like him. He had some savings that had been lasting way too long.

“Here, take this and don’t be late,” Sunhee caresses his cheek and readjusts his glasses. She has been preparing his launch every single day since he got into the university. “You have to be strong and study lots so you will get a decent job and live your life happily.”  
Yet again, the same speech as every day. He knew his grandma cared about him and was worried about him but sometimes the pressure was a lot too much to cope with. He usually feels like he is constantly running away from responsibilities and duties, even if he didn’t like to disgust Sunhee.

Somehow, that day felt different. He looked at himself in the mirror: messy and long black hair, ugly glasses that made his eyes look ten times bigger, a boring shirt under a sweater and a grey pair of pants as boring as the entire outfit. Always the same but different at the same time. His backpack full of philosophy books and almost ripped notes.  
He breathed, long enough to contain the air in his lungs. Another day, another challenge.

He made it to the university, no one would look at him, no one would talk to him. The you’re-invisible-feeling striking again. He had no friends, even if he tried to talk to people, he didn’t fit.  
Having lunch in the cafeteria, he took his phone and looked through his chats to message someone. He typed an ‘I miss you, come back soon, please I feel so alone without you!’ to Yeri, a girl he met at the beginning of the university year.  
Taeyong constantly thought he could trust her and open to her about his wounds and boundaries, but somehow that wasn’t something easy to do. He was surprised when Yeri messaged him back after a couple of seconds, with an audio note.

“Taeyongie baby, I’m missing you too! I’m having lots of fun here; every day is different! On Saturday they hung a party, right? I was dancing like crazy, drinking like crazy and then I met lots of people! You can’t imagine!” There was a pause for Yeri to laugh, enjoying while remembering the situation she was involved into. “I made out with two guys and- wait… Four girls!” Taeyong eyes sparkled while listening to her, fourth and last year of university and studying abroad must be wild. “German people are fucking hoooot! Anyway message me anytime, okay? I wanna know how you are and how’s everything going, remember I love you and I think about you constantly!”

Wow, that was a long ass message for sure. Taeyong smiled, he was kind of happy for his friend… Yet at the same time, he was jealous. He wanted to live fully, to be as extroverted as her, to be as funny as her. It was pure admiration because he grew up surrounded by books instead of people. But he wasn’t scared to live and that was something he just knew.

Immersed in his own thoughts of admiration and endearment, people were making a fuss at the place.  
“Hey, who is that hottie?” “Lol, that dude is sure muscular, look at his body! Are you sure he is from this university? I mean, he doesn’t look like studying philosophy or anything art related.” “That blonde hair… I wanna run my hands through it and never let him go, aaah!”

Those comments totally repulsed Taeyong. But he was curious, wasn’t he? He threw the rest of his lunch to a trashcan and started to walk around those people, wanting to see who they were referring to.

And _shit_.

It was Mark, Mark Lee. The same Mark Lee that lived near him, the same Mark Lee who had been his childhood friend since he travelled to Canada and disappeared for almost two years. That Mark Lee, who never tried to contact him. Mark Lee, who was influenced by people’s comments when they started studying at the same university and stopped talking to him because his friends told him Taeyong was a bad influence.  
Taeyong wanted to come closer and say hello, but at the same time he had some dignity very deep inside him so he ran away. He hid in the bathroom and wished for the day to go as faster as it could.

* * *

  
“I am so happy when I am with you, Tiyongie!” An adorable kid with a crooked smile held his hand and intertwined their fingers in a strong grip. “I wanna play with you forever!”  
That warm sensation of joy made little Taeyong’s heart flutter with emotion. Someone so different from him, someone that was as bright as the Sun. An imperfect human being yet so touched by God’s hand it felt unreal.

“Let’s… Let’s be friends forever, Makku,” a shy proposition, flowers in Taeyong’s hands, wanting to be placed over Mark’s black and abundant hair.  
The latter looked at him, took one of the wild poppies and encouraged him, grabbing his wrist so he could do whatever what he wanted with the flowers.  
“I will always be with you!” little Mark tilted his head, now decorated by a single red poppy. “You can trust me! I’m Mark, the best friend of Tiyongie!”

For Taeyong, it hurts to smile. Nevertheless, having Mark by his side was something that made him believe in himself. When they were together, it was like time stopped and the world was their property. Little eight years old boys living their innocence like it was infinite. Never-ending afternoons at the park, listening to music together, sharing secrets and being sensitive about things other boys couldn’t even imagine.  
No need to worry about broken hearts or stupid money. Just hoarding up the time they were together because no one of them knew such feelings were so ephemeral.

* * *

“If I told you what happened yesterday…” Taeyong typed in his Kakaotalk chat with Yeri, putting some sort of overwhelmed emoji after sending the first message.

“Tell me, tell meeee!!”

“You still up? What time is it in Düsseldorf?”

“I DON’T SLEEP!! NOW WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED, TELL ME AND STOP FUCKING AROUND LEE TAEYONG!”

“Okay so I was in the cafeteria when I messaged you, right? And you aren’t gonna believe who’s back in the town…”

“LEE TAEYONG”

“OKAY OKAY… Mark, you know Mark?”

“You mean your crush? The guy who ignored you? Yeah what about that stupid guy, I don’t care and you shouldn’t care as well.”

“Well… you listen to me, Yeri. Everyone was freaking out about him, forreal. You know he got a scholarship to play basketball at Vancouver’s University, right? The guy was blonde, wide shoulders and back as a rock. Girls and boys were going nuts, I tell you.”

“Yeah and WHAT ABOUT IT??? Don’t tell me you fell for the guy again… You have more important things to think about right now, Taeyong.”

“It’s not like that! You know I despise the guy… I just wanted to gossip about it with you,” Taeyong rolled in his bed, smooching his hamster plushie. “And about the second thing… any ideas, Ms. Einstein? You know I’ve been applying for jobs but no one calls me ever! Maybe it’s because of my looks…”

“Naw, your looks are fine, just a bit too much of a nerdy guy. But you’re cute, you just need someone to dress you like a normal person of your age and not like you are in your sixties,” she stopped typing for some seconds. “Sorry, my roommate was crying over his boyfriend again… What I’m telling you is that I’ve got an idea, but I’m sure you’re gonna say no.”

“How can you be so sure if you didn’t tell me… What are you waiting for, u mofo lol”

“Okay what about… Letting others to see you… you know while you’re doing nasty shit on yourself?”

“Wait, prostitution?”

“No!! It’s not like that… Well, it’s somehow like that… but not that…” Taeyong was as confused as ever. “It’s like you go to your computer, put on a cute outfit and undress yourself so others can see you. You’re a jack-off addict basically and I know that, so why not being nice with other people so they can see you when you do it? Lol I know people here and they earn lots of money just by standing in front of their computers, showing off on the Internet.”

“Sure, you’re totally nuts, Yeri. Plus I’m ugly and skinny as fuck OTL”  
“You’re getting on my nerves, stupid ass hoe! You don’t have to show your face, you can never show your face either way people will know it’s you! And you’re cute as a button, I’m sure many people would die to have you in their beds! Trust me, you should give it a try…” Taeyong sniffed on his pillow, enjoying the fabric scent. “GTG babie! My roommate is crying out loud and I have to comfort them! Think about it and you tell me when you take a decision! ILY!!”

It was about 4AM and Taeyong had spent the afternoon shifting between studying for an exam and playing videogames. Of course, he wasn’t sleepy at all so he researched on Google to see how that job could work for him. He found people of any body-type and any ethnicity, people with bare hair on their bodies or vice versa, people playing with toys while wearing perfectly matched outfits, etc. The thing was, they all were having a nice time with themselves and others seemed to enjoy the content they were offering. Some of them even had fans.  
Sadly, it was time to sleep even if his mind was working non-stop thinking about that issue. He took a look around his room and saw his anime figurines, which he thought they could never judge him.


	2. sempiternal (ugh, oh)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i can't recall what i wrote for this one lmao i just know it's short, sorry :( i'm not used to multi-chaptered fanfics

His parents always acknowledged he was a different kettle of fish. Mark was so smart he always had good grades since he was little, he was good at every sport and his personality was as sweet as caramel. Being the only son, he was super spoiled.

When he started to enter the puberty he noticed he was very popular between girls and boys. That he could take that and do whatever he wanted with people just for his own convenience. People always had the idea of him being a literal sunshine but the thing was Mark was pretty calculative. If you want to earn things, you have to fight for these things; _nothing comes for free._

When he started to study at college, he had many friends. Specially his comrades in the basket team. His life only revolved around basketball, he had no time to hang up with friends outside of that. He focused hard on his studies and basket practices that he didn’t even mature as a person. He wanted to make his parents proud, to achieve a goal as big as playing in a star team in the future. To be known in the whole world, even if that meant he had to sacrifice everything else.

Besides that, Mark was a person with many insecurities. His desires to be the main character of the story were a problem when people didn’t pay enough attention to him or didn’t praise him. “No matter how hard you try; you’ll never be enough” “People will forget about you if you don’t do well” “What if they are only playing around you?” “Do they believe in your qualities?”

His life drastically changed the moment he got a scholarship to play basketball overseas. He knew it was his thing, that thing no one could beat him in it. That it was a _gift_. That he would be able to break free from his overprotective family and develop his personality as well. That it was the opportunity he was waiting for.

He would be living in Vancouver for two years, being able to practice his shooting guard techniques, improving his skills non-stop.

He had such big expectatives he definitely was going to conquer. The two years he lived in Canada he tried all kind of things: alcohol, drugs, having multiple partners, going to parties and a large etcetera.

And when he decided to go back to Korea, he was pretty satisfied with the experience. He became so independent he could cook his own meals for the entire week, wash his own clothes and he even became fluent in English and a little bit of French.

However, not all that glitters is gold. Mark became better in many areas but when it came to his personality… he was mean, small-minded and uneducated. Everyone let him do whatever he wanted he stopped caring for people’s feelings at all. He was an egoist selfish brat with an angelic face, blond silky hair and two guns for arms that could destroy you.

He could get everything he wanted but couldn’t be thankful for it. He was avaricious and never had enough of anything. He was just a fake hero for fake people.

That day in the cafeteria, he felt like a star. Surrounded by people that wanted to approach him because of his talent and not because of his possessions.

Mark enjoyed the attention way too much. His ego was over the clouds. But then, after listening to the many things everyone was gossiping about him, he spotted a pair of eyes he could recognize even if many years have passed.

It was Taeyong, the same Taeyong that used to cure his wounds whenever he tripped over the sticky ground of the park. The same Taeyong that smiled at him like he was the only friend he had. The boy who saw something inside him before everyone saw him like he was some kind of God. The Lee Taeyong boy whose hands and body were tiny but owned an enormous heart. The boy that became an obstacle in his life and whom he vanished from his thoughts for over two years.

In that moment, he felt something unbearable. He wished that Lee Taeyong was out of an imagination; a shadow. But he somehow was, because Mark was the only person in the room that had looked at him in years.

* * *

“I’m doing it………………………………”

“You doing what? Dude why you always being so misterous,,”

Taeyong laughed when he saw Yeri’s message, betting that she would probably be drunk at that hour.

“I said that I’m doing what you said to me yesterday.”

“NO SHIT SHERLOCK!!! I Knew tht… yea but how ya don it…!”

“I just bought cute things and, you know, those toys… you want me to send you the images? I even bought a new camera for my computer lol it’s embarrassing… Everything was cheap tho…”

He didn’t even wait for Yeri’s response, he sent a bunch of screenshots to her mobile phone: one of a sailor outfit, another one of a playboy bunny, an image of a buttplug, some lubricants, a pair of kneesocks and stripped panties and even a long black-haired wig.

“Dude that ton of qt shit!!! I WANT EVERYTHNGGGG!”

“I like cute stuff, you know… And I saw people often like fem… boys? so I’m going for that aesthetic… AND I mean all types of people so maybe I could earn more money…”

“MA BUSSNES BOYE!!! or whateva you want me to adrss you! I LOVE U AND IM PROUD OF U!! u better buy me nce stuf when i c you lol- btw this partys nuts!! I kinda like a girl so imam go for now babey WISH ME LUKKKk!”

Taeyong sent a kiss emoji and locked his phone. He was ready to look at himself in the mirror wearing something different so he got up from the bed, listening to how much his grandma was snoring.

He took the sailor outfit: the skirt was short, blue color and soft as a feather. The top part matched it so sweetly Taeyong was perplexed at the moment he took a look of it.

His tiny waist looked gracious and the width of the skirt made his butt a bit bigger. But maybe that was too much… So he changed to a wide sweater, matching it with stripped laced panties. He combed his hair and took some photos in front of the mirror, the way his attributes were showing.

His skin was pale and his long legs were out of this world. Maybe Yeri was right and he wasn’t that ugly after all. One hour and a half had passed since Taeyong started photobombing himself and after that, he finally decided which photos he was going to publish in social media. He opened Twitter, used some hashtags and waited. Waited for at least two hours when his phone started vibrating a lot than prevised.

“Wow… such a cutie…”

“The panties fit you well, I would like to see more of you.”

“Even your name is cute, ah… Kittiwaii-hyung…”

“I’m a girl and I like this, what’s wrong with it, nsfw Twitter!? Go follow him, he’s pretty!”

For Taeyong, feeling validated by strangers was something he never experienced before, but it felt incredibly good. The attention was so overwhelming he locked his phone and tried to sleep, reddened cheeks out of fluster. Maybe he could try it again tomorrow.

* * *

Monday at uni was a total inferno. No matter how much he walked and walked around the campus, everyone at a single damn corner was talking about Mark.

On the other hand, he has gained around thousand followers in the span of the weekend. So when Thursday comes, he would definitely dress up and make a video for his followers to buy. So he could start gaining money and see if life wasn’t a burden after all.

After lunch break, he had to attend history class which was near to the bathroom. He entered the place and saw two boys leaving, pushing him when passing the door. He had no time to say sorry so he just stayed quiet, looking down on the floor. When he was about to take a piss at the urinary, he side-eyed the boy at his right and noticed how recognizable his hands were.

Taeyong swallowed, looking up to see who was the boy and almost shitting his own pants in pure fear.

“Hey…” He didn’t know how to react the moment he saw Mark, looking as fuzzy as ever behind his glasses.

The taller boy was quiet and ignored the mere salute.

“I wanted to say hello the other day… but- but everyone was around so…”

“You think I would talk to a freak like you?” cruel and detestable, nothing Taeyong couldn’t see it coming. 

“Mark, I… I know I was being too pushy with y-”

“You’re gross. Stay away from me.”

Mark zipped his pants and abruptly pushed Taeyong to a side, finally leaving without a word.

He couldn’t put a name to the feeling at that moment. He was angry, sad, disappointed at the same time. Not with Taeyong but with himself. He wasn’t a bad person, wasn’t he? Everyone admired him, everyone looked after him then why he felt so miserable when he was around Taeyong? Why in the hell he felt so pathetic the moment he listened to his name coming out of his lips?

He ran around the campus, crowded with people that weren’t attending their classes, searching for a place to be alone. He felt anxious, like he couldn’t breathe. He should have stayed in Canada.


	3. deprived: kind of

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this chapter is really short but!! i wanted to do a cliffhanger sort of thing...?? the next ones are going to be more interesting, i swear! but for now, enjoy the third one and leave me feedback if you liked it or if you have any recommendations <3

Thursday came and it was around 6PM when he made it to his home. Sunhee grandma was drinking a glass of whisky while watching Coffee Prince on the TV. Numerous bottles of soju were empty on the table so Taeyong had no choice but laugh at the scene.

“Having a good time, grandma?” he asked, leaving his keys at the entrance.

“Taeyongiee, my baby, my son, come here and kiss this old woman…” Taeyong did as he was told, placing a gentle kiss on Sunhee’s cheek. “Now leave it, damn! No matter how many times I see this series, it always gets me glued to the TV!”

The boy sighed, going upstairs to get inside his room. He played League of Legends with some online friends for a while till it was time to have dinner. He practically obliged his grandma to eat and then left to his room again. It was time to get into Twitter and see the many comments and direct messages he left unread.

“Please, upload something today, Kittiwaii-hyung…”

“I’m dying to see you in those cute outfits you’ve been preparing for us!”

“Hyaaa!! Kittiwaii’s so cute and soft! I wanna smooch!!”

All those mentions and messages were similar, making him smile with satisfaction. But out of those messages, there was one person that was kind of strange. Someone with a more mature way of writing, someone that caught his attention.

“Hey, I was wondering if you could send me any videos of you? I’m willing to pay you so much money… I like you, Kittiwaii.”

He tried to stay calm and analyse this person’s profile. Their profile pic was someone in a jacket suit, with a plain black tie around the collar of the shirt. For what it seemed, they only had twitter for sexual purposes. Nothing out of the usual.

“Sorry for taking too much time in replying you, JYY. I would be honoured if you see the video I’m going to film today! (⁄ ⁄•⁄ω⁄•⁄ ⁄) It’s going to be up in my streaming channel in some minutes. I hope you like it. And don’t worry about the money, it’s a little amount because I’m just starting, hehe…”

Right after that, he went to his closet and gulped while seeing the sailor outfit.

“Don’t worry, Taeyong… they seem to like you so you don’t have to be shy,” he talked with himself in a whisper.

Somehow he felt an urge to put on some lip gloss and turning on a dim light to change the mood of the scene. He turned on the streaming and waited a bit, readjusting the skirt so his thighs were the most visible thing on the camera. After ten minutes, there was almost fifty people on the streaming.

“Hi everyone! It’s Kittiwaii here! How are you?” He talked with a sweet, low-pitched voice, waving with his hands.

Everyone started typing in the comment selection, as nice as they could be.

“I’m happy to be with you today, guys! Do you like my outfit? Uhm, I don’t know where to start…”

Even if Taeyong had created some sort of character, he was still shy and insecure. His followers started to encourage him, even some of them started saying dirty yet respectful things to put him in the mood.

He untied the lace of the sailor outfit and started pinching on his nipples, gently caressing them with the fingertips. Arching his back and closing his eyes out of pleasure, he moaned softly. From time to time, he opened his eyes just to see the many donations the viewers were doing.

“Thanks, JYY79, Peachygirl and uuh, Urdaddy69… Do you like it? I’m doing it… right?” his voice went high the moment he tickled his own belly, playing around the waistband of the blue skirt. “I wish I could touch you the way I’m touching myself, hm…?”

He ran his fingers over his thighs, teasingly lifting the skirt to show them his panties. He was incredibly horny, his little bulge pulsing under the fabric, leaking some pre-cum already.

“It’s so hot in here…” he whispered, licking his lips repeatedly. “I wish you were here fucking me…”

He set aside his panties, releasing his tiny and wet boner, twitching in the middle of the air. He started jerking off, teasing himself with his long skinny fingers rubbing the tip of his cock. He did this many times before in the past, exploring the stuff he liked and the stuff he didn’t. But knowing people were watching him and probably touching themselves with the image of him was another thing.

“God, my insides are so empty… I wanna feel full, ah…” he arched his back, pinching his nipples again, this time stroking his bulge faster than before. “I want you to use me as your fucktoy, hmmh- I want to fulfil your desires…”

His body was going crazy with electric waves and hip spasms. He started moving up and down, fucking his own hand shamelessly. He felt like crying, he even felt like having three orgasms at the same time if that could be possible. Dressed like that with people watching him, being addressed by pet names and being praised constantly was making him go nuts.

“Please- Oh, fuck…” his cock won’t stop doing weird nasty sounds, his hand tightening up around it.

Erratic moves, choked moans and sweat going down his neck. Clothes all sticky over his skin, the lust running through his veins and the blood concentrating between his legs. All his senses were put in it, finally releasing an odd load of cum over his thighs. Taeyong was out of air for some minutes till he could recover a little amount of energy to read the comments.

“Shit man that was so sexy!”

“God I wish that was me who were fucking you…”

“Mommy would take care of you so well, my little kitten! You can hit me anytime you’re free!”

“A total masterpiece. Want to see more of you, Kittiwaii, I’m totally into you.”

The last comment was written by JYY, the first one who donated to his livestream channel. Taeyong downplayed the fact that it was the same person who he has been talking to through private messages, as long as they pay and enjoy the content, it was good for him.

“Thank you so much, folks! Comment me on Twitter about the things you would like to see from me, Kittiwaii will do his best to please you all! Will see you on Saturday, okay? So don’t miss me that much! Bye-bye!”

* * *

Weekend came as fast as expected and for what it seemed, the Dianthus Fraternity were throwing a party at the main building of the Campus. Dianthus Fraternity was the biggest association in the university, they promoted Christianity and often celebrated masses in the chapel. They were considered paranoid people by most of the students but truth be told, their parties were the best. Everyone was invited no matter their skin color, age or urban tribe; Dianthus Fraternity believed in God but they were chill and respectful.

“You should attend the party and try to make new friends!” Yeri replied cheerfully, trying to dare Taeyong.

“I don’t think I fix… plus I’m sure Mark’s gonna be there, and I don’t know how to react to him being close to me…”

“Can you please, PLEASE, stop thinking about such a fucking toxic machoman like Mark? For real, Taeyong, you’ve been crushing on him for years, can you just turn the page?”

“It’s easy for you to say, much people like you! You get to make out with whoever you like! You’re that attractive, Yeri… But I’m not.”

“Tell me, aren’t you already earning money with the webcamer business tho? You know how hard is for people to pay for watching someone? People get free porn everywhere on the internet YET STILL they are paying you for jerking off and undressing yourself. If you think they are paying you but don’t see you attractive, well dear you’re pretty wrong.”

“You made a point there,” Taeyong sighed, tussling his hair. “But they don’t see my face.”

“Again with the same shit, dude! Your face is so princely like lol- Trust me, can you please go to the Saturday party instead of being in your home shoving things up to your ass?”


	4. 16:13-14

Airports were on another level of shitty places, there was no doubt about it. The food was horribly expensive, people were as uneducated as they could be and there were so many restrictions. Yeri was superbly tired as she landed in her hometown but honestly she was feeling nostalgic since weeks ago. And knowing Taeyong needed her help was the perfect excuse to travel back. Nevertheless, it was going to be a huge surprise.

That night, she didn’t message Taeyong at all. Just put on some of her beautiful glittery dresses and a pair of white Converse and went to the Campus, about three martinis making a fuss inside her stomach. Classy and messy.

On the other hand, Taeyong didn’t know what to wear; so he went for a flowery shirt his uncle gifted to him three years ago, a black baggy shorts and old Vans. Those were the things he never put but gave him a different vibe. A modern one instead of an ‘otaku’ one.

He wasn’t sure, he was scared and wanted to run away, but at the same time he remembered Yeri’s words all the time. Sometimes you just gotta fake being someone else to fix, even if it’s not the best option.

When he made into the main building, he looked around and didn’t find anyone recognizable. Some guys were laughing about a probably misogynistic stupid joke; some other people were playing beer pong in a table near the entrance.

Suddenly, two hands tightened up around his waist, making him shiver in fear.

“I saw you on the Internet, baby.”

“H-hey, cut it out!” he elevated the voice, trying not to tremble. What if someone was trying to bully him again?

“Jokes on you, sillyyyyy! You didn’t recognize my voice? Turn over!”

Taeyong almost screamed at the top of his lungs when he saw Yeri. He suddenly hugged her as if the world was going to end right now.

“How!? Why are you here? Oh my god, Yeriii!! I missed you so much! I’m so happy to see you again!”

“I know, bitch!! I was supposed to be in Düsseldorf to the end of this year but I told my tutor I wanted some days off since I’m getting good grades… And guess what!! He accepted! AND NOW I’M HERE! With my Taeyongie!!”

Both were so, so happy that they couldn’t put it into words even if they wanted. They held hands when coming inside the building, catching up. Yeri had a lot way more things to talk about than Taeyong, but he was in that pink state full of joy he didn’t care about that fact.

“It’s been so hard without you! Every little thing became a big thing, Yeri,” Taeyong stretched up the grip on their hands, looking around the place to see if there was something he could drink.

“I know, but you also know that I won’t ever let you down, right? No matter how far we are, I will be always looking for you! And cheering you up in every decision you take, baby,” Yeri made a pause, serving them two cups of punch, wishing that sweet beverage had alcohol in it. “Except if you take bad decisions, whose you are gonna take with the time, because I know you better than I know myself.”

“I know what you’re talking about… And please, it’s hard for me. I’ve been crushing on him for years, even if he is an insensitive prick. Ignoring him would be the best for me, that’s the logical thought. Do you think I am that stupid to not knowing what to do?”

“Yep,” the girl just laughed, drinking the wine fruity punch in one sitting. “I honestly don’t think like that when it comes to you, but the heart has its reasons. Whatever you do, you will get damaged, because love is as hurtful as you can imagine.”

Sometimes Yeri sinned of being like a mother to Taeyong, because even if they were almost the same age, she had that emotional intelligence he didn’t own at all. Sometimes Taeyong wished he could give her important and good advices like she did with him.

“I just…”

“Okay, Yongie, STOP TALKING RIGHT NOW! This is OUR song that they are playing! Let’s DAAAANCE!” Yeri grabbed him by the collar, dragging him to the enormous living room where everyone was dancing.

‘Annihilation by i_o ft. Lights’ was playing, loud and neat. Yeri laced her arms around Taeyong’s neck for a moment and when the song broke, they started jumping like crazy. She wanted him to be shameless, to be as free as he could be when they were together. Maybe life wasn’t hard for Yeri in the past so that’s why she grew up to be that way; that was something she was proud of, something she wanted to teach to her best friend.

Little by little, they were getting closer, Yeri undressing Taeyong the way his sweaty chest was shining with the colourful disco lights. He didn’t complain, he wanted that. And for a moment, he enjoyed it without thinking about people’s opinions.

“I CRAVE FOR ANNIHILATIOOOON,” they both singed at the same time before kissing sweetly.

But in a corner, there was a shadow. Someone observing, whose eyes couldn’t be seen behind a pair of big, old glasses. Taeyong noticed that person, but couldn’t see their face, neither what they were doing. Maybe it was just paranoia, there was no way it was someone he met on Twitter, right?

He tried to obviate the detail and kept drinking and dancing all night long, nothing could be wrong when his best friend was around, taking care of him.

* * *

A strong, uncontrollable desire. Something unknown that possesses the body, the power and the pressure that doesn’t let you think. Sexual drive.

Taeyong had extra classes that day, he hasn’t talked to Yeri during the day, just because his mind was nowhere. He talked to one of his classmates that day, an introverted guy who had few friends. He didn’t know how he happened, how he took him to the male bathrooms and dropped on his knees as fast as he could.

That guy, he wasn’t really cute, neither pretty. He was just a normal guy, probably in a closet, like Taeyong was. He was quiet when Taeyong unzipped his pants, the palm of his hands trembling with anticipation. The other guy pleading for contact, wanting Taeyong to suck him already. Knowing someone he barely met that day was that anxious for him… the sensation was running through his veins. He always wanted to feel desired, no matter what it could be the reason.

He looked up, gently kissing the fabric of his boxers with salivating lips. He wanted to make a mess of his victim. Actually, Taeyong never sucked a dick, but judging from how confident he got out of the party, he knew he was going to do well.

Slowly, his tongue was all around the skin. Sucking on the tip momentarily from time to time, masturbating the guy as best as he could. His cock was nice and big, Taeyong was thankful he was clean and had it shaved. A very good first impression for his first blowjob. He was immersed, not hearing the boys that entered the bathroom meanwhile he was at his job.

He smiled when he noticed how the guy’s dick was twitching, his hips being in tension, his balls about to explode. Cheeks red, hair stuck to the forehead, desperately panting in murmurs.

“I’m about to…” Taeyong listened to the warning, nodding.

A person entered the bathroom at that moment, having to stop because the guy was becoming noisy with his ministrations. Hearing the stream of the water and how the person was washing their hands, he continued.

“What…” the third guy talked to himself, approaching the bathroom square in which Taeyong was locked with his hook-up. “There’s pretty fucking weird noises coming out of this one.”

Taeyong feared for his life.

“What the hell, it smells weird too,” a voice he could recognize, fuck. “Go have repulsive gay sex to another place, you fucking faggots!”

He felt threatened, having to stay quiet, frozen in that position. “You fucking disgust me!” The boy kicked on the door, exaggeratedly spitting. After some minutes babbling something unintelligible, he left.

Mark Lee was definitely out of his mind. And was, surely, a danger to everyone.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> for the kiss between yeri and taeyong, it was short but i wanted to portrait the kind of friendship i have with my best friend~ he always says that kisses between friends are love kisses too dkhf idk why i am talking about this... but yep, chapters are really short and i'm sorry, i prefer to divide my fic in more parts instead of writting large chapters... so i'm more constant about it or so i don't know sdjfhsdf hope you're liking it by far, i'm having little feedback but i'm appreciating it! so please, keep passing by, y'all make me really happy ♥  
> next chapter is going to be A BOMB IG?? 👀 it's kinda cool in my mind, got inspired by /that/ episode of euphoria and also i don't know if you guys noticed that mark is really inspired in nate, but not as psychopatch as him sdjfhsdf WELL BYE SORRY FOR THE TMI


	5. your eyes tell

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i wrote two more chapters, but since i'm going on holidays i guess i will have time to decide and think about how i wanna end this fanfic of mine? my bff has been helping me with the scenes and such, glad i'm going to see him!  
>  i would much appreciate if you comment me ;__; last chapter no one commented OTL i'm such a butthurt lol  
> hope you enjoy this one as well

Remain calm. Smile, pretend, articulate with your entire body. Fake you are interested in what they are saying. But in this case, Mark couldn’t do that. His energy was at its lowest range lately, that town was draining it out of him.

No, he didn’t understand. He couldn’t understand why the anxiety on his chest didn’t let him breath. He had tried to concentrate on other stuff, all the time he was back in Korea. But being surrounded by people during the twenty-four hours the day had… He couldn’t help it but fail.

When he wanted to notice, it was Saturday again. Another weekend party at the University, he wasn’t in the Dianthus one because he passed the night playing Counter at home.

“Mark, you comin?” he saw the message notification popping at the screen, it was Jongin. “Dude everyone wants you to come, don’t do us dirty like the past weekend…”

“Told ya I have to study.”

“Lucas, you fucking tell him to COME RIGHT NOW, I dressed up already ffs”

“Come on bro, nothing to lose, much to gain. Beautiful girls all around the place, I bought weed… Taking my bong with me… If you are not in the mood, we smoking in the garden.”

“Ok.”

Mark took his black track-suit pants, a pair of Nike shoes with white socks and the University bomber, Punching Lions embroidery in the back. He always felt secure when he was wearing the name of his team somewhere. He got out of home, not telling his parents where he was going at almost three AM. He lightened a cigarette and got inside his car.

* * *

Taeyong had lost Yeri in the crowd of the party and was nervous about the fact she didn’t message him in almost an hour. He was left drinking alone for moments, but said fuck it and started talking to anyone he found curious or funny. His social abilities were slowly growing, he was concerned it would take time, but being used to bullying, he had a no for a start.

He approached some girls that were a mix of different styles: one of them was plenty goth, the other two had a modern style that also caught his eye. They danced, talked about banal themes like the people in that shitty University or how much they liked Taeyong’s outfit for that night.

He went to the kitchen of the house for a moment, he was sure he didn’t know who lived here so he could have been unsure about which things he should touch or not… But being as drunk as he was, he didn’t care at all. And there was so many people burning plastic flowers directly from vase, throwing all the trash to the floor and making noise everywhere.

“What are you doing here?” a pair of bulging eyes stopped him from taking a beer from the fridge.

And guess what, it was his worst nightmare again.

“I said what. Are. You. Doing. Here,” Mark Lee repeated, like he didn’t listen him the first damned time.

“Someone invited me…” Taeyong looked at the dirty floor, feeling intimidated already.

“Does someone knows you at this party, huh?” Mark’s pronunciation sounded broken enough to know he was drunk and confused.

The big wide boy approached to Taeyong, making him feel smaller than ever. Mark looked around, all the people were quiet, looking at the show.

“Does anybody know who THE FUCK is him?!” Screaming, the veins in his neck became bold.

“I’m just minding my business, I…” nerd boy tried to talk, tried to escape, tried not to cry.

“I know who you are… Yeah, yeah, I see you… What do you want, huh? You want some fucking attention? Cause I’m getting you attention…” a large pause, everyone was silent. “Does anybody know who THE FUCK is this freak?!”

“WHAT THE FUCK IS YOUR PROBLEM?! You wanna hurt me?!” Taeyong screamed at the top of his lungs, pushing Mark back. “No one can hurt me, you CAN’T HURT ME, MARK LEE!”

Erratically breathing, Taeyong noticed Mark’s rage in his eyes. He approached again, faster and faster, throwing a punch in the air. Luckily, he didn’t hit Taeyong, but the second one went directly to his face, breaking his cheek bone and bleeding non-stop.

Taeyong ran to him with busted strength, veins injected in blood. “WHAT DO YOU WANT? WHAT DO YOU WANT FROM ME?” He repeated like a mantra, pushing Mark again and again, punching him in the face when he got the opportunity.

“I’m going to…” Mark was going to attack, but stepped back and lost unconsciousness. With his eyes blank, everyone went to help him, causing a fuss.

Taeyong vanished from the place, directly running to the door. He took his bike with teary eyes and dancing hands and wished life wasn’t so cruel.

* * *

It didn’t have to be a bad day. Mark knew finals were coming, but also knew he was way more intelligent than all the professors in the university. It wasn’t ego, it was pure mathematics.

So when his friends told him to take a trip to the city, he accepted. He used to party all the time in Vancouver, but his real friends weren’t there to hold his head when he was about to blow chunks. The last train to the city center was about to depart, so he looked at himself in the mirror for the last time before leaving the house. He was looking brilliant; a vintage look-alike sweatshirt with orange and black tones, stripped track-suit pants, Lotus hi-top sneakers and a funny pack of an unknown brand tied to the waist. 

Last party was a completely disaster and he passed out, remembering little flashbacks of the show he gave to every single person. He was going to forget that completely during the night, even if he had to drink all the alcohol they offered in Ballesta Club.

“Phew, Mark! Run, the train is about to go!” He could see Jongin waving at him from the escalator, almost tripping but finally getting inside the train.

His friends did their personal greeting with him, some of the girls they brought laughed at them, in a cutely way. Lucas took out an Absolut Vodka bottle he hid in the interior of his leather jacket and they all started to drink before going to the disco.

A couple of hours later, they were dancing to the rhythm of dark heavy techno music. Mark felt dizzy with the interminable song, or maybe all the songs sounded the same. Lucas and Jongin were distracted doing goofy dance moves between them, while the girls were looking and throwing their drinks constantly. Mark hated clumsiness and how shameful were girls when they were boozy.

Mark didn’t like when girls were too ‘masculine’ or when they had a high-pitched voice tone. He didn’t like when the clothing was too short or provocative, it wasn’t elegant at all. It irritated him seeing them wearing ugly shoes or weird hairstyles. Doing a depreciable face, he went to the bar to ask for another drink. He thanked the waiter while sipping on his gin tonic and gave him a proper tip, he had enough money after all.

“You new around here?” An unknown voice tapped on his shoulder, calling for his attention.

Mark looked at him from head to toe, a guy with long dyed hair, some piercings in the ears and face, wearing a fishnet tank top. “Name’s Yuta, by the way,” he smiled, tucking the hair behind one of his ears.

“Yeah,” Lee replied, losing a bit of vision due to the alcohol. “Mark, a pleasure.”

Sloppy kisses and messy touches. Those were unknown hands, touching him. Nails painted black, spiked bracelets almost scratching the skin of his chest. Mark shivered under such ministrations, letting his mind blow away. He closed his eyes when that man dropped to his knees, aggressively taking him in his lips. Wet as water, sweaty and manly hands caressing his balls.

He closed his eyes, momentarily thinking. But he was inside his mind, controlling the way his heart was beating.

‘Taeyong, Taeyong, don’t think of Taeyong.’

He looked at Yuta, the guy he just met and shoved his entire cock inside his mouth, panting at the pleasant feeling. He had to focus, but not knowing how he ended in that dirty and obscure bathroom was making it difficult.

They were silent, only music could be heard in the background. Mark grabbed the guy by his hips, put him against the toilet and took the condom he offered to him. He was drunk, he didn’t care.

‘Just don’t think of Taeyong, please.’

Minutes later, the Yuta guy was screaming at the top of his lungs. He moved at an erratic pace, his insides sucking Mark’s cock. He sounded vulgar yet sexy. Mark thought of how different Taeyong would sound. Imagined Taeyong asking for more, dying out of pleasure. Imagined Taeyong taking his hands, caressing his own skin with them, pleading. Imagined the spark in his eyes, the saliva out of his mouth, his mind going mad crazy with a mere touch from Mark. Imagined his face, his arms, his chest, his ass, his legs.

And then, he touched the sky with his bare hands. Out of breath, tired, drunk and miserable, he left.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> at first i was going to write mark with a random guy like i did with taeyong, but i reminded rockstar yuta and i couldn't help myself to write that lol not only jock mark is into nerd guys but kinda fancy goth ones?? we'll see eyes emoji


	6. the hard way

Taeyong should be happy with all he conquered in less than a month. He was pretty satisfied and made many friends in nsfw Twitter, not to talk about the money he was slowly getting with the business. He was happy he could buy more food for his grandma and him to eat, he was happy he could go out with Yeri anytime they wanted and he could spend money in mangas and merchandising.

Talking about Yeri, he calculated she had to go back to Düsseldorf in some days, so he wanted to enjoy his time with her as much as possible.

But there was one thing why Taeyong couldn’t be totally happy.

One day, he went out to have some bubble tea with Yeri. They had dinner outside and they parted ways coming back home, since they lived in opposite directions. It was kind of late when he was messing with his things to find the house keys.

When he was about to open the door, there was something sticky on the knob. He looked around, at the floor. Too bad he found a used condom, wanting to scream at the fact he had cum in the palm of his hand. Honestly, it wasn’t entirely about such a gross act but the thing it could mean.

Lately, he got more messages than before. He couldn’t know who did this, who could be stalking him, who could be making this out of fun to bully him. But he instantly thought of Mark, who else could it be? Most of the people he had in social media liked him, why someone that liked him would do something like that?

It had to be Mark, he was the only one that considered him enough to make his life a constant nightmare. But why coming at his house door? He was that kind of _psycho_?

Totally repulsed, he tried to ignore it. Went for some water and soap and cleaned the whole door, wishing his grandma was okay.

“I think I’m becoming paranoid,” he messaged Yeri at 5AM, wishing she was awake.

After 3 minutes approximately, she replied.

“Why? I mean why are you sending me this message at this hour with no explanation at all, dudeeee,” she complained, rolling in her bed.

“When we were at the Dianthus party, you remember that, right?”

“Aha,, we had a really good time, baby! Now tell me what’s the issue”

After twenty minutes of Taeyong trying to avoid saying it directly after bringing out the topic, he finally said to Yeri what happened that night. That he saw a shadow, that someone cum at his door hours ago and that he thought it could be Mark who was stalking him.

“….!!!!!! WHAT THE FUCK” Yeri’s fingers danced over the phone keyboard. “Are you sure it’s him?”

“I think, I don’t know how Mark’s cum smell, you know…”

“If you think it’s him, YOU HAVE TO KNOW HE IS FUCKING DEAD!!! I WILL FIND HIM AND I WILL KILL HIM, TAEYONG!!”

“Please, wait- Yeri,” he sent that message, feeling stressed. “What are you planning to do?”

“I don’t know RIGHT NOW MAN IT’S 5AM I ONLY KNOW I WILL FUCKING KILL HIM.”

“Please, relax and don’t do crazy shit. Lemme try to resolve this by myself.”

“NO,” Taeyong was worried at the reply. “Well, OKAY… But you have to tell me if anything more happens. Please, I have travelled hundreds of kilometres just to be with you… And I want you to know you’re not alone. You got me and Sunhee, and we will protect you as far as it takes.”

“I know, I love you.”

“I love you too, baby.”

* * *

“I have something new for you today!” Taeyong waved at the webcam.

He was over the bed, standing on his knees. His waist looked as tiny as always, his skin white like snow and his body a little chubbier thanks to the stuff he has been eating lately. He was sort of insecure because of that, but it seemed like his followers didn’t care at all.

He showed off during some minutes, reading the messages in the chat and gently laughing at them. They seemed to like his voice as well.

“Okay, okay, just look at this! What do you think, huh?” He finally stretched his back, showing them some black panties with pink gummy bears printed in them. “Those are the ones I recently bought! I like them a lot, and I hope you get to be with me during today’s show. I also bought something new with the refunds, thank you so much for always treating me good. I love you all.”

He then proceeded to bring out a little toy, a bullet vibrator painted in pink about 8 centimetres long. While pinching his nipples and jerking off at the same time, panties down and vibrator stuck in his insides, the stream was on fire.

Many donations at the same time, popping in his screen while he was constantly moaning out loud. Thanks Sunhee grandma who went outside with one of her friends.

When he was over, all of his thighs and abdomen full of cum, he had earned around 680000 KRW. But somehow, he missed the feeling he got having sexual intercourse with someone. He used to daydream with having a life partner with whom he could be streaming together and how lovely that could be.

* * *

That day Taeyong was in a good mood. It was Saturday, Yeri invited him to the public pool at the afternoon and they both came back to their houses to dress up and go to party at night. Taeyong felt free when he was with his best friend, like he could conquer anything having her by his side.

They had known each other for some years now, but he couldn’t run out of his comfort zone before because he was stuck in there. Sometimes it’s hard to do it, you need a little help from your friends or even a therapist but he never had enough money to pay for one.

He would look at himself months ago, when he passed the days between philosophy books and drawings. He knew well his hobbies and the things he liked weren’t bad, but people always made him feel like they were. Finding the perfect balance between being the true Taeyong he wanted to be and keep on liking the stuff he liked was difficult after all.

He was feeling _fearless_. He decided to wear a crop top shirt Yeri lend to him, full of flowers and bright colors —it even had parrots, Taeyong totally loved it. A pair of old denim shorts inherited from his father, who used to wear them during the summer in the sixties. Old Vans and he was ready, walking till arriving to Yeri’s home, picking her up.

Nothing out to the usual that night, they came back home when they felt tired or drunk enough. They always had a funny time together.

But when Taeyong came to home, he heard something coming out of his room. He thought of Sunhee having one of that sleepwalker episodes in which she scared the fuck out of him but he could hear her snoring.

He opened the door and looked around, nothing strange. Did he left that book over the desk? He couldn’t remember and trying to focus in something right now was nearly impossible. Looked at the walls who felt like moving, the tingle in his hands and feet demonstrated how drunk he was.

He closed the door and went to sleep.

The morning after, he woke up and looked for something to wear. He rummaged between his clothes, even taking a peep at the basket to see if he had to put something in the washing machine. No matter where he looked, he couldn’t find his gummy bear panties.

Then, a notification popped in the screen of his phone.

“You looking for them, right? Too bad I took them without asking, my condolences. Next time you should reply my messages, don’t you think so? You left me hanging for weeks now. I miss you, Kittiwaii,” shit, it was JYY. “They smell good… I promise you I will put them to good use. For now, we will keep in contact, cutie.”

Taeyong definitely had a stalker and, for bad, it wasn’t Mark. But someone probably worse.

* * *

Yeri promised something days ago. But she lied. She certainly didn’t know if Mark was his best friend’s stalker but damn, that guy was a real jerk. He deserved a callout.

It was Monday, around 3 in the morning and she still had that despicable hangover due to the Saturday party with Taeyong. Since when hangovers lasted _that much_? It wasn’t important at all.

She took an old spray can she had in her room from her skater days and a ski mask because you have to look thug enough in social media. No one was going to see her and even if someone caught her she would run like Flash if it was necessary.

She got on her bike and went to Mark’s house. Took out the spray can and shook it enough to start painting in the house facade. Fast and smiling under the ski mask, she was pretty satisfied with the final result. Capital letters and black spray were enough to make a work of art.

‘Mark Lee is a faggot’ sounded good enough. After all, she wasn’t doing an act of vandalism; she was just stating facts.

She saw someone passing and thought ‘Yeri, you need to get the hell out of here’ and so she did, uncontrollably laughing.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yooo putting notes at the end just to show you guys a little art dump i did for this au!  
> [click here](https://imgur.com/b7aZHWD) <\- and tell me if you like it!   
> also yes yes... i know i said i was going to post my drawings of this au if i got enough feedback but honestly i don't think this is gonna get more than this and i have enough with the comments you've been leaving and all!   
> i only have one more chapter written and i'm on my holidays rn so i don't know how much it will take for me to upload :( sorry for that, hope you liking it so far


	7. break my broken heart

Finals came and everyone was a bundle of nerves around the campus. For Taeyong and Mark, it was easy and it quickly passed away. Nevertheless, everyone that wasn’t them knew that Dianthus Fraternity were such a pill after exams, since they always did a meeting for new upcoming students next year. 

Dianthus Fraternity not only were Jesuschrist fanatics as everyone knew, they had a Debate Club and were the staff of the student council. They used to be the professor’s favourites and they counted on them to do what they didn’t want to do at the end of the day.

Taeyong not only begged Yeri to accompany him to the meeting, but practically forced her. Real friends had duties. But if Taeyong knew what Yeri did some days ago… he would probably be mad at her. He asked, though, but she lied again and again and said it was probably someone who Mark used to bully as well. Taeyong didn’t have choice to believe her, she promised it.

In the other hand, he was so scared of the current situation he was living he didn’t say a single word to her. Maybe if he was quiet everything would pass away eventually. And after all, he didn’t know who JYY was, neither how he looked, neither his age or his location.

He took a photo that day, before cleaning the door of his house. He had taken screenshots of the conversations he had with JYY, in which Taeyong was such a nice guy and JYY’s messages were creepy as fuck. But there were no actual proofs of a crime and he knew police won’t do much.

“Really, when this shit starting…? I am tired of waiting here,” Yeri complained as she adjusted her seat at the main auditorium of the University.

There wasn’t that much people so they ended up seating in the front line.

“I guess when the president of Dianthus comes and starts talking…? You’re so impatient, I know it’s the same old thing as every year but it’s our last and it’s obligatory. You’ll probably miss this,” Taeyong whispered, laughing at how concentrated the people on the fraternity were. It was stupid though, since they had planned the same speech year after year.

“Hello and thanks for coming. My name’s Jung Jaehyun and I’m the Dianthus president for this year, thanks for choosing me,” he welcomed everyone in the room and for the way he was talking, Yeri knew it was going to be boring as hell.

Jung Jaehyun seemed like a normal guy with a normal life devoted to God, if that’s the usual. He picked his papers and tried to organize them, but seconds after all the papers were in the floor. “I’m sorry, give me a moment,” he apologized, bending.

It was then when Taeyong saw something he wished he didn’t see. Jung Jaehyun was wearing his gummy bears panties. He could see them when he bent down, over the pants waist. Taeyong felt like throwing up, putting a hand to his mouth. How Jaehyun knew he was the one in the streamings? How did he know his address? Was him the guy that painted the door of his house with cum? And over all of that, how his stalker could be that _close_ and he didn’t notice?

“Yeri.”

“Yes?”

“Can you… take a photo of his butt?”

“Why? I mean, I didn’t know you were such a pervert, but…”

“Just take it already, please,” Taeyong practically begged, his guts punching his insides.

Yeri managed to hide her phone partly behind her backpack, taking the damn photo seconds before the guy ended picking all of his papers. “Okay, done…”

“Now, _please_ , get me out of here.”

* * *

Some days after the reunion, Yeri took Taeyong to the Police office to report his stalker. With the screenshots, the photos of the door and the guy wearing the panties, Taeyong had no choice but to tell the police what his business was. Gladly, there was nothing illegal about it; if it had been a few years ago, he might have ended up in jail for pornographic work, but Seoul was already well advanced on that subject.

Sadly, there wasn’t that much the Police could do. They showed off at Jaehyun’s house and took him to the office, made him confess and, since it was a minor case, he would be doing social work for one year and a half. About the University, they expelled him and threw him out of the Fraternity. As penance, he would have to abandon his last year of University and get back when he finished the social work.

Police didn’t work as it should, but at least he had a restraining order and his life was kind of ruined.

Everything passed so fast that Taeyong didn’t know how it worked, however he didn’t feel safe but, with time, the wound would heal and he would feel better around people. He knew he could trust someone someday.

* * *

Taeyong wasn’t in the mood for a party, but that was the last for Yeri before coming back to Düsseldorf, so he ended accepting.

It seemed like his best friend knew the guy who was throwing a party on a Sunday, called Johnny or DJ J-egg like he liked to be addressed. He must be crazy for picking that day, but it seemed all the people in the place were as crazy as him for assisting.

“Tiyongiiiii,” Yeri dropped her arms over Taeyong’s shoulders, a tipsy smile on her lips. “I wuv you sooo ffriginn muuuuch!”

“I love you too, I’m gonna miss you,” he was drunk too, but not on that high level. 

“I KNOOOOOW,” she looked at him, with a pouty face before sticking her eyeballs in a pretty blonde girl going around. “But now, I have to go.”

“Hey!! Don’t leave me here, FUCK’S SAKE, YERI!” Taeyong screamed as she left, running after the girl, who was pleasantly looking at her. He knew that kind of look, the I’m-gonna-devour-you one.

Let your friend enjoy herself and be mad at her for months, that was Taeyong’s motto every time Yeri did him dirty.

He walked around the house for a bit, stealing people’s drinks and wishing he could be having fun like Yeri. He took some footsteps and went upstairs, zigzagging thanks to the free alcohol. He wanted to sleep or eat something or talk with someone if that could be possible. He chose a random door of the many ones the house had and ran to the bathroom, throwing up to feel better.

But when he was out of it, he saw someone sitting in the verge of the bed. Alone in the dark, just the dim light of the moon reflected on their skin.

“What are you doing here alone?”

“I don’t know, I don’t seem to like these parties anymore,” Mark replied, not looking at who was talking to him, neither recognizing his voice.

On the other hand, Taeyong stood up in front of Mark. The latter looked so sad Taeyong wanted to pat his head and he was going to do it, but Mark raised his head.

“What…” was his first reaction, looking angrily. “Why in the hell did I tell you that? What are you doing here? Get the fuck out of the room, now!”

But Taeyong didn’t do as he was told. He stayed.

“What the fuck is your problem, Mark? Do you hate me?” The blond guy stood up, looking at the door as he was going to leave. “Have the balls to leave right now.”

Out of anger, Mark took Taeyong by the collar of his shirt, both rows of teeth pressed against each other. A moment of silence, everlasting. “Tell me, Mark Lee… Why are you always hiding? Are you scared of me?”

Taeyong shortened distances, became closer. He could smell Mark’s breath, hot and steady. “Scared of my eyes? Of my nose? Of my lips?” Mark grew angrier for moments, but he was right.

He was scared of Taeyong. Scared of his censored desires, of his own thoughts in which he was always present, scared of how weak he would feel at the moment their lips touch. Scared of losing his life, of going insane, scared of crying at the feeling on his chest.

“Nothing yet? Do I have to punch you again so you will talk?”

But there was no need. Because Mark kissed Taeyong out of the blue. He crashed his lips against his, hastily and _fucking messy._ He held Taeyong strongly, his hands down on his arms, fingertips clutching at the skin.

His own insides tearing up; that sensation of crying, of tripping, of falling inside a black hole.

Taeyong’s heart stopping for a whole minute. He continued, he didn’t want to look back right now. He felt like a teenager, like that was out of a fairy tale even if it really wasn’t.

Mark threw him impulsively at the bed, not even caring on getting rid of his clothes. Taeyong’s chest going up and down erratically, eagerness growing from his toes to the last hair on his head.

“Kiss me more,” he demanded when Mark took a break, looking as confused as ever.

He didn’t want to talk; his lips were occupied cupping Taeyong’s ones. Hands couldn’t be seen, everywhere and nowhere at the same time. He kissed him, again and again till they felt their lips like bruised. He bit Taeyong in every place of his body, marked him as his own.

Taeyong, he didn’t understand the situation. He just moaned, feeling electric shocks non-stop. It was when Mark touched him in that place that he realised it was happening. But it was so dream-like… he even liked the pain. Instead, he was yearning for it.

With his head against the pillow, his hair being pulled back, Mark’s fingers inside his mouth and the saliva dropping out of it; he felt complete. And to think he used to hate the pain…

Mark’s hands grew bigger as he rocked Taeyong’s hips back and forth against his cock. His baritone voice was music to his ears. He was getting excited, losing control, and he totally hated that. His entire body shivering at the contact, slippery and sweaty.

“Fuck, fuck, please,” Taeyong cried for his life, prayed for his soul if there was some God up there. His hands groping the bed sheets, his tiny and useless cock asking for more, leaking pre-cum anxiously.

Then, he came pathetically, tears in the verge of his eyes.

“Yeah, slut,” Mark smiled, thrusting a bit more. “Fuck, yeah,” releasing a big load inside Taeyong, probably regretting that in the future.

He felt like passing out, his extremities still pulsing like fire. He looked at Taeyong, in the same position, moving to a side to get some sleep.

But there was something Mark didn't know… And it was that he wasn't the only one who had been watching him all the time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ok i didn't abandon it!! i went on my holidays then work was a fucking hell and i feel sad and don't have any inspo... this is the last chapter i wrote, i will try to write chapter 8 in the upcoming weeks but i can't promise something :( i don't wanna upload this fanfic if i'm not satisfied with the outcome... sorry if someone was waiting for a long time!! i'll do my best, thanks for sticking with me after all this time <3

**Author's Note:**

> please leave me feedback I'M BEGGING :(( i often abandon fanfics because i don't see people leaving feedback or reading them... i am that shitty person, sadly. hope you enjoyed the first chapter and you are interested enough to keep reading!  
> and also if you liked it, here's a moodboard i did two years ago about this au: [click me ♥](https://zeroplace.tumblr.com/post/172513281849/nerdjock-markyong-au-in-which-they-are-childhood)  
> if this gets enough kudos and feedback in general i will link you the drawings i did for this au too, in the end notes as always!


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